I’ve decided today I don’t love being pregnant. I mean if you can get past the long stranger stares at your rhino belly and the multiple pregnancy symptoms such as constant cleavage sweat, leaky bladder, weird veins, and lastly my favorite…super sore pubic bone, then I guess it’s not bad. I think if I dropped a hundred dollar bill I would gladly watch it float away just so I wouldn’t have to bend over one more time to pick it up. (If you’ve ever been large and pregnant you know what I’m talking about.) Some women are great at this “growing babies” business. I don’t prefer it.
On another note, feeling the baby move is the coolest! And I love the flatulence. Some women don’t like all the extra gas pregnancy can bring. But, I could win any toot contest! And if you don’t love to “rip it” ….well, you are just lying! It is inconvenient around other people. However, I don’t mind trailing it through Wal-Mart. (Yes, that’s me.)
This holiday I keep thinking about all the things I would do if I wasn’t preggo. Next year, I will ice skate under the influence of some serious spiked nog. I imagine the blades of my skates aflame because I’m so light and fast! After, I will attend a Christmas vigil blitzed. And I will wear tight fitting tartans!! Beautiful holiday tartans! But for now I will enjoy the flatulence and my skin tag farm. In true Mama June style, (Honey Boo Boo’s mom), I will celebrate my pregnancy tonight with a tall glass of dairy and a can of pintos.
I made this advent calendar. I’m super stoked about it so I’m sharing with you this small tutorial. It’s modeled after a pottery barn one I saw but is no longer available for purchase.
Measure your burlap next to the wooden dowel. You want to make a perfect square with the burlap. Cut two pieces. Lay print side to print side. Sew just like you are sewing a pillow case, but sew three sides together…leave one side open. Turn right side out.
Place bags equally spaced. If you are a rockstar, pin the bags and sew on the burlap. If you are lazy and hate sewing burlap…hot glue bags to burlap. Make sure your gun is not a mini gun. You will be using lots of glue. Mini guns are too slow shooting out the amount of glue needed.